A few weeks ago I made it to the light at the end of the tunnel. Like the rat in the trap. I was no longer interested in the cheese. I just wanted out of the trap. My phone company was OK with letting me continue month to month. The old phone is working fine. Checked a lot of the options of other plans and companies. My deal was spot on with most everything. Never go over on minutes. Long distance. Since I have no social skills all the sharing and media stuff is no big deal.
So I get an email from the phone company. Free i phone. Unlimited minutes and text. So many gigs. etc. Two year hook.
Happened to be driving by the phone store which is on the other side of town on another mission. Guess I'll just drop by and take a quick look see. My two and a half year old kerosene phone works just fine. Dial and call. Rings and answer. The few text messages I would receive or send cost 20 cents each. No big deal.
Forgive my ignorance and not caring. I did not care or know what these phones do. This one is free. This one is a hundred dollar upgrade and works internationally. Both obsolete I am sure. But spiffy to me. Since I have only been out of the county I live in about four times in a year the international thing wasn't really necessary. Again grandiose feelings pop up. Somebody's gonna call me if have one of these phones. I can even text them back for free. A hundred times if I want.
My little two and a half year old faithful and kerosene powered LG right there in my nerdy little holder. Charge it about once every two weeks and works like a charm. I spilled a glass of milk on it a few weeks ago. Was drying it off and the face bubbled up. You did it now dummy. Just got out of the trap and ruined your phone. It was the plastic cover on the front. I thought I took that off a long time ago.
So I can get the holder, car charger (which I hardly ever drive), the scratch package and something else for another $50. Or just the holder for $45. I'll take the package, smart shopper that I am! Those two text messages I receive every month will be no charge. The hundred or so minutes I use will not come close to the unlimited minutes I now have. I know right away when every worthless email hits. I can even read the mullet wrapper (local newspaper) with it. The GPS will tell someone somewhere what side of the commode I'm hitting while taking a pee. I have weather, internet connections and a million other things available to me.
That new electronic smell. Pretty package. All these features and a pleura of options and apps. Move in the twenty first century man. I can whip this out and really be cool (although it is about twelve phones behind the time and won't work in Nicaragua anyway). And when these new medical bills start rolling in they can wear me out in every way shape and form. Everyone who fries chicken at the local grocery store needs all this tech and features.
All for a two year contract and about twenty more dollars a month. I'm going to quit smoking anyway. That will more than pay for it. Did I not mention that it has a calculator? Well I have about three days to take it back and revert to my month to month basic plan. Pay a $35 restocking fee. I do not know if I can get the $50 back for the holder, car charger and scratch package. It however may be like a prophylactic. Invaluable when new and worthless when used.
I guess that tomorrow on the way to (yet another) doctor I will swing by the phone store, pay the $35 dollars. The little nerd reared up and came out of his hole. Realizing that the hole is where he belongs.
No comments:
Post a Comment